Ask any of the (3) people that know me – “What thoughts do you associate with Bob?” and you’ll get many things in reply.
“He is a pretentious annoying prick.”
“Ugly, fat bastard.”
“He is the Reverend Doktor Bob.”
Now lets have a look at that last point. Dr Pepper. It does seem to many that I have an addiction to Dr Pepper. Hell, I got a costco’s supermarket membership just so I could buy it by the case. I drink it all the time. Approximately 60% of my tweets are regarding Dr Pepper. But why?
I love it. That’s why.
But there is more to it than that. As an atheist, I worship no gods, spirits, magical faeries or virgin mothers. But I sometimes feel the need to express an undying love for something. Something that will never let me down. That something is Dr Pepper. By making each time I drink it an almost religious experience I fulfil my desire to give control of myself to someone/something that will absolve me of all responsibility. I’m sure that’s what most fervent believers in religion desire when they go to church, to feel that they don’t have to take responsibility for their own lives because their god will do it for them. When I drink a Dr Pepper I have an incredibly personal experience that pushes out the rest of the world. I devote myself to it and it devotes itself to me. And it’s a hell of a lot more reliable than any Yahweh, Allah or Vishnu.
yes i drink it at work
Oh, and – DR PEPPER IS YUMMY!!!!